The Conversation Grid: Listen to God by Listening to People
Practical Urban Mission - Part 4
By S. Crawley
Our current series, Practical Urban Mission, introduced three essential elements for successful urban mission.
It aims to draw on experience and observation across several teams, cities and countries to give:
- practical tips for urban mission which are useful and relevant anywhere, AND
- flexible enough to allow for God's creativity in diverse and complex urban environments with diverse teams and harvest workers!
This is our third post digging into the second essential element - discerning how God is already working so we can respond in prayer and action. The key to discernment is to be curious and attentive as we go about our daily lives.
Previously we looked at the People Map - a visual tool that helps us listen to God.
Today we will look at the Conversation Grid, a tool that helps us listen to people and what God might be stirring in them.
The Conversation Grid
The conversation grid helps us listen to people and discern God's work in and with them.
It does this by raising our awareness of the kind of interactions we are having. Are they Casual? Meaningful? Spiritual? Do we see Hunger or Curiosity?
With greater awareness, we can intentionally explore ways to serve our Father and our conversation partner.
Let's take a look at the different sections of the Conversation Grid!
Artwork: Linda Tan
Casual Interactions
Casual, everyday interactions will vary depending on culture.
These might be verbal (e.g., "How are you?" "Have you eaten?") or non-verbal (e.g., a nod of the head, a wave). They might seem superficial, but in a city there are soooo many people who DON'T acknowledge or speak to us. Casual interactions indicate some friendliness or openness.
In casual interactions, we can listen to the willingness to interact more and/or go deeper.
Meaningful Interactions
Meaningful interactions go beyond the superficial.
Interaction at this level might involve emotions (positive or negative), significant events, meaning & purpose, or more personal information. Meaningful interactions usually involve a level of transparency and trust. Again, there are many people in a city who will not be willing to interact with us at this level. If they do, it may be significant.
Where meaningful Interactions happen, we can listen for specific areas of hunger or brokenness, and opportunities for us to serve (whether by listening, by prayer or by action).
Spiritual Interactions
These are not the same as religious interactions.
Religious interactions usually relate to a specific religious culture and its practices or belief. Spiritual interactions often involve points of connection between the person’s life and the spiritual realm - topics like prayer, meditation, dreams, spiritual experiences, spirits or God. Even if the discussion is purely intellectual, it could indicate spiritual openness and interest. These things are often considered deeply personal, so when the topic comes up it should get our attention.
In spiritual interactions, we can listen for significant spiritual experiences, areas of hunger, and other people in the person’s life that they discuss this with.
Hunger/Curiosity Interactions
In Hunger/Curiosity Interactions, the person is leaning toward us or our God, our perspective, and/or our experience.
Their interest could be spiritual, emotional, or intellectual, but they want to engage more with us and what they are glimpsing or sensing in us. This is very significant. If we are living with Jesus at the centre of our lives, there's a good chance that they're leaning towards Him, although they may not realise that yet.
Listen for what EXACTLY they are hungry for. What is intriguing them? What they want to know more about? Who in their lives do they talk to about these things?
Then What?
First and foremost, pray!
It's important that we don't jump in with teaching or solutions at this point. Our role is to serve the work of God and serve the hunger of the person. Rather than assuming we know what God is doing, we need to bring that question to Him - whether it's in our quiet time of prayer or a silent prayer mid-conversation. He is doing good things, and we want to follow His leadership!
Depending what we are discerning, a good next step might be providing an opportunity for the person/people to be exposed to God in the context of their hunger or curiosity. More on that in a future post.
Something To Remember
It is important to note that this tool is diagnostic, not prescriptive.
Our goal is to discern what is happening, not to try and force something to happen. The different parts of the Grid are not linear, and we are not trying to 'get' people into the Hunger/Curiosity part of the Conversation Grid. However, the tool can be useful in helping us see where someone is going or willing to go conversationally.
This, in turn, may give us some clues about what God is doing in this person's life and help us play the part He is inviting us to play.
For Reflection
1. A Scripture - John 4:1-30
It is good to remember that Jesus was emptied of His divinity (Phil 2:5-11) and experienced the same weakness and temptation we do (Heb 4:15). This means He did not automatically know everything but was dependent on the Father for leading and insight (eg John 5:19). Read the story in light of this.
What does this passage tell us about Jesus' approach to conversation and discernment?
2. A thoughtful question
Are there any relationships where you currently interact on a casual or meaningful level who might be open to interacting with you on a spiritual level?
3. A possible application
This week, use the Conversation Grid to think about your interactions with people. How does this impact your awareness of God's work in the lives of those around you?
Discipling the Urban Harvest provides practical insights and encouragement to walk with God in multiplying discipleship in an increasingly urban world - growing as children of the Father, serving the communities He has called us to, and discipling those hungry to know Him.